Is your child having a difficult time making new friends? Especially as it’s back-to-school season, your children may find themselves in new surroundings with other kids they don’t know well. Making new friends is a fun part of starting a new school year, but it doesn’t come easily to everyone. Meeting new people and making friends can be a challenge for children of all ages, but there are many different ways that you can help your kids with this skill.
1. Talk with Your Kids
Kids – young kids in particular – can struggle with controlling their emotions. But keeping their emotions under control, especially when they’re angry or frustrated, is also key to making friends.
You can help your kids to get control of their emotions. According to studies, parents who talk to children about their emotions in a sympathetic, problem-solving way can help those children improve their emotional self-control. On the other hand, punishing or trivializing a child’s negative emotions can lead to poor self-control for that child.
What does this mean? It’s important for you to have some honest conversations with your child. Talk about negative emotions and give them coping strategies to deal with anger and frustration in a positive way.
2. Help to Build Social Skills
If you find that your child isn’t making friends because of poor social skills, you can coach him on basic social skills to improve his ability to interact with others. Teaching your child about skills like sharing, being fair to others, and dealing with conflicts can help prepare them for playing with other kids. Role-playing and setting an example on your own can help these lessons to sink in.
3. Set Up Small, Short Playdates
You can set up small, short playdates at your home to help your kids make new friends. These playdates mean that you can be nearby to supervise, and shy kids can benefit from having friends over in the familiar setting of their own homes.
You can use these playdates as learning experiences for your child. Have a discussion in advance and highlight what your kid can do to make your guests feel welcome, and how to fairly choose activities that all of the guests will enjoy.
4. Get Your Child Involved in Activities
The structure of a school day doesn’t always leave opportunities for your kids to meet new friends. Instead, sign your kids up for some activities that they enjoy. Activities like sports, art groups, theater groups, music ensembles, and clubs can help your kid to meet others who have similar interests. Plus, the team design of activities like sports, music groups, and theater groups helps to build relationships and a sense of unity and belonging among the kids.
Your child’s school probably offers a variety of activities, but you may want to explore other options like community groups, your local YMCA, church groups, and more.
5. Travel to School with Friends
Carpools for kids are great for a number of reasons. Not only do they ensure that your kids can get to and from school and activities, but carpools themselves can help your kids meet new friends and build relationships with kids they’ve met at school or during activities. Carpools allow you or another parent to supervise the kids in a safe, quieter space that isn’t as overwhelming as a busy playground during recess or a crowded school bus.
Want to set up carpools? GoKid makes it easy, allowing you to invite other parents and their kids to the carpools.
These five tips can help your kids make friends, and while it may be tempting to get heavily involved, your kids ultimately have to be the ones to do the work. Stay involved in a supporting role and be patient. Finding good friends can take some time, but with a bit of help, your kid should be able to find a great group of friends.
